Hillary, won’t you please go now?

9/12/2017

Well, Hillary Rodham Clinton is publishing a book called What Happened.

It’s not called What Happened? and that’s too bad because that seems more like what the former secretary of state, first lady, and senator would like to call it.

Maybe even What the hell happened?

Or something stronger.

Or perhaps, most apt of all How could this happen?

That’s really the question Mrs. Clinton has been asking since the election.

Over, and over, and over again.

It just wasn’t supposed to occur.

Her defeat was supposed to be politically and numerically impossible.

How could a political amateur, and someone Mrs. Clinton has since called “a creep,” defeat the Queen, just as she was about to ascend to her throne?

It still seems, Clinton campaign people tell us, like a bad dream from which all right-thinking people have not yet awakened.

It was a very close election, it must be said — with the slightest of margins in three keys states. But the answer to how and why is voters. A whole lot of people who are not usually very political showed up. Many more who were silent about their preferences voted in key states. These were the infamous “deplorables” — the first to be blamed by Mrs. Clinton for taking what she thought was hers.

This might be a subtitle for this or the next book: How the deplorables ruined my coronation.

But Mrs. Clinton’s answer to what happened, which the public will have to pay to hear her deliver personally when she goes on the road to promote her book, keeps changing. And none of her answers to “what happened” are words like voters, or democracy. And none include the word “me.”

Mrs. Clinton’s explanations for her loss are, thus far, and roughly in this order: the Russians; James Comey; the entire FBI; the press; the Democratic National Committee, and, most recently, Bernie Sanders.

Bernie Sanders, who campaigned hard in several states for Mrs. Clinton.

Would she have done so for him?

You learn more about a person in defeat than victory. And what we have learned about Mrs. Clinton, pretty definitively now, is that nothing is her fault — ever. She is a sore loser who will not get off the stage.

And it looks like she’s going to stay up there until even her old supporters start to leave the theater or begin to boo.

Mrs. Clinton’s insistence that we share her sense of entitlement and grievance is unseemly in the extreme. It has become unwatchable.

Remember the Dr. Seuss book Marvin K. Mooney Will You Please Go Now?

We need to rewrite it and send it to Chappaqua, with apologies to the good doctor.

Dear Mrs. Clinton,

Won’t you PLEASE go now?

Just go.

Go.

Go!

We don’t care how.

You can go by foot.

You can go by cow.

Hillary Rodham will you please go now!

You can go on skates.

You can go on skis.

You can go in a hat.

But

Please go.

Please!

You can go on stilts.

You can go by fish.

You can go in a Crunk-Car

If you wish.

You may go

By lion’s tail.

Or stamp yourself

And go by mail.

Hillary Clinton

Don’t you know

The time has come

To go, go, GO!